Curiosity instead of grief.
Understanding a thing feels safer than feeling it, so when something devastating happens, you reach for a notebook before grief, and you're only half joking calling that a coping mechanism. Curiosity is the one appetite you never apologize for — you'll chase a question into rooms others run from, since not knowing scares you more than the answer could. People mistake your excitement for detachment, but caring about the mechanism never meant you don't care about the cost. Underneath the energy is someone doing the only kind of mourning that ever made sense to them. The Eye notes: your questions were never about the thing itself — they were about staying close to what you couldn't feel.
Get your read — free on iPhoneYou're allowed to feel it first and understand it later, just this once.
What your questions are really trying to stay close to.
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